Saturday, September 27, 2014

The Big E


We returned to the Big E this week.

The Big E. The Eastern States Exposition . The state fair, held yearly in Springfield, Massachusetts , is where one can watch baby chicks  hatch,  horses cantor and  both huskers and  ears of corn, husk. 

Really?  Aromatherapy can cure Lupus? Dont tell Big Pharma!


A Selfie: me with two sleeping cows

and the inevitable conclusion. 




  I love the big E , long after friends and  family have  dismissed the gluttony and  the kitsch. They view the fair as hopelessly tawdry  and vulgar , appealing to  base,  blue collar appetites . 
            I love the Big E because I view the fair as a response to all that is wrong with our  modern lives . In a world of homogenous apathy, the Big E  may be the only place on the planet where one can view the lovingly  grown,  largest gourd  in Connecticut and  vicariously  experience the honest, exuberant  joy of a 16 year –old who  won a ribbon for raising the  best groomed cow in New England.

I have no idea what she's doing but she's proud and excited!


            I have always lived in proximity to state fairs.  We visited the  Danbury State fair  yearly until someone decided Connecticut  needed a Forever 21-chocked mall     more than a tractor pull  competition, and maybe they do.  The New York State Fair  lies 5 miles from upstate medical school in Syracuse.  I couldn’t begin a year  without inspecting the  life sized butter sculpture.
It’s September 21, 2011. I stand at the portal of the Brigham and woman’s hospital, checking-in for my stem cell transplant, We are silent and grim.  There is no future, only  disease.  “You have 10 years to live,” Firsh told me four years previous, and now, with my disease  surging ahead,  six more years  on this mortal coil seems an impossibility. The admitting nurse eyes us warily.
            “ Why are you here?”
             I ignore the existential entreaty.
  “We were told to show up at 9 AM.”

            “That’s crazy. They’ll just make you sit here all day, they wont admit  you until tomorrow. Go do something fun.”
             The  Dana Farber is  110 miles from the big E.  We had to go. The unspoken message was, of, course  “You may never  see a polled Hereford (1)  again, you might as well go.”

            We had, I recall, a wonderful time. I  was the proud possessor of a  central line, an IV that runs through the chest wall directly into the heart. I spent the day trying to fool everyone I was drinking beer through the plastic straw -like attachment protruding from my shirt.  I had been given a quick lecture about immunity and my complete lack thereof.  As far as I could tell,  everything one could see, touch or eat at the Big E was on some banned list. I remember Cyn running behind me, laying down a path of Purell as If I were a  giant  snail secreting a glistening alcohol trail.
            I remember taking real inspiration form the Big E that day. I was about to have buckets of poison and, apparently a little local beer, poured directly into my heart for the next few weeks but,  in  Springfield,  life went on, oblivious to my insanely  perplexing predicament. 
            At the Big E, each New England state is given a pavilion in which to display its local  wares, foods and customs.  The Maine pavilion serves  potatoes at 6 dollars a serving, demonstrating  Maine’s two famous  exports:  starchy tubers and chutzpah.  New Hampshire’s pavilion was transformed into a big state lottery ticket store. Massachusetts was all about the chowder.   Vermont ‘s  exhibit  extolled the virtues of flannel outer ware and  maple syrup.  In our Mall -saturated world,  where one can buy the same Victoria secret  bra  from coast to coast, shopping at Vermont’s  Flannel  shop  for  comfortable  plaid work shirts was strangely liberating.
            The day passed. We drove back to Boston.  I lived.
            We returned to the Big E last week.  The cancer is gone, but the malady lingers. I have aged  far  more than 3 years over the past 36 months.  I worry my enthusiasm and life -wonder is ebbing under a constant onslaught of medication and discomfort. This year, I was less willing to  dismiss the morbidly obese, lining up to buy hamburgers  served between two doughnuts.
            I had my shopping list for this year:  A new Timex watch from the Connecticut  pavilion,  some lavender soaps  and flannel  nightshirts from the Vermont  display,
            The fair has changed.  The Timex exhibit where I stock up yearly on  cheap watches  ( three for $50) is now home to  Pez, another  Connecticut product. There may be no more useful object on the planet than a cheap, rugged wristwatch.  There may be nothing more redundant and useless than a Daffy Duck Pez dispenser, available at any  Wal-Mart  across this  monotonous. indifferent   land of ours. I feel a real sense of loss as metal watch mechanisms  are replaced by  sugar and plastic.  The soaps are gone, replaced by yet another ice cream shoppe.  I do love Ben and Jerry but I can buy a  pallet of Cherry Garcia in  Stockton, California, and yet the one  factory in Vermont that produces  little bars of lovely    lavender soap is out of business.
            I left the Big E this year  with mixed emotions. I’ll be alive next year. I just  accepted a three year commitment with U.  Conn to mentor their med students, and I intend on  shaking their hand in four years. I’m just not sure If I’ll return  to the  Big E.
The joy of life is in the unexpected, the breathtaking, the unique. My survival is no longer  breathtaking  or unexpected  but neither is the Big E.

(1)  The Polled Hereford is a hornless variant of the Hereford with the polled gene, a natural genetic mutation that was selected into a separate breed beginning in 1889The Polled Hereford breed is bred for its deep forequarters, depth and muscling, docile temperament, fast-growing calves, and good quality of beef

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